Enjoying being in the moment with Grace
It was nice being with Grace last night. I didn’t worry about anything; I just enjoyed her company. I hope she felt the same.
Hypno thinks I taking holidays to escape
My session with the hypnotherapist was interesting. She mentioned that holidays are often seen as an escape, and I realized my belief system is rooted in not wanting to be in Rotterdam—I’m only here for Grace. I feel a bit angry and anxious. If I could take the day off, I would, but my motivation for work is at a low ebb.
I ate at home again tonight and drank less. Maybe my meals haven’t been the healthiest lately, but I’m getting there. All the procedural tasks for the month are done. Now it’s about me, my book, and learning Dutch, plus planning a trip to Colombia.
Lying next to Grace again
I lie next to Grace, and she loves that I’m with her; she makes little noises and smiles. I can’t let her down. When she’s gone, I’ll take a few months off—that’s what I need to plan. I cherish my first hour in the morning; it’s a time for reflection. I need to make peace with the past. It has no bearing on the future and only brings me down.
